One of the fears that I noticed during my self-improvement journey is taking that leap of faith. Starting something new can send chills all over your body, and I get it. Fear-based thinking when it comes to a new beginning is standard, but the issue arises when that thinking causes you to stagnate. Many people stay in unfulfilling situations because they are familiar with it. You know, like your friend who is still with their partner, despite them breaking up 50 times already, or that family member that ALWAYS complains about their job but still works for them. Everybody’s situation is different, but most of the time, individuals stay because they are comfortable.
As people, we all crave stability in our lives; anything that can jeopardize that sense of security is nerve-wracking. However, we tend to undermine our happiness due to that stability, especially when we know this situation is mentally, physically, spiritually, and/or financially unhealthy. I overstayed in unhealthy environments and connections all because of that sense of familiarity. Saying statements to myself like, “ Well, I am used to this” or “I'd rather stay here than go somewhere new, and it fails” is the first mistake I made when it comes to embracing the unknown is my wording.
Our words are incredibly powerful and can unintentionally manifest bad outcomes. If you keep telling yourself, “I'm going to be alone forever,” you will always believe you are not worthy enough to find healthy long-term connections. However, by changing how you speak about a new beginning and reframing your statements, you can shift your mindset and empower yourself. Instead of saying, “ I'm scared this person is going to hurt me” , say, “ I am open to getting to know this person”. By reframing your thoughts, you can take control of your fears and start something new with a positive outlook.
Another tip to embracing the unknown is changing your perspective on the situation. This tip works hand in hand with the first one well. Think of this: the situation you are fearful of leaving was once something you first started. You probably had the same hesitations now, but something caused your past self to move forward with this situation. Changing how you look at a situation can limit the hesitations connected to this new beginning. Whenever I fear starting something, I see it as an opportunity to reintroduce myself. Make sure that the perspective you pick has a positive undertone to it. For example, Instead of thinking, “Omg, what if the work environment is worse than my last one!’ look at the situation from this perspective: “ This new job is about to be an amazing experience, and I’m going to meet new interesting people!”
My last tip for embracing the unknown is weighing the pros and cons. This one is for my visual learners ( I see you, lol). Sometimes, it is easier for us to see the positives and negatives when written in a more physical way. Pros and cons lists are my favorite go-to to see if a situation is healthy. This is more if you pick between 2 or more choices, but it works for any situation. My favorite way to utilize the pros and cons is choosing between 2 people or job situations. Write down how both situations will benefit you and hinder you in a present and future timeframe. This method helps you self-reflect on what you will and will not tolerate. By self-reflection, you can make more informed decisions and feel more confident in your choices.
Starting something new is scary, but you only know what is behind that door if you open it. During episode 14 of season 3 of Abbott Elementary, the character Mr. Johnson says this quote to Janine, which resonates with this topic perfectly.
“ Things will go wrong whether you do what you want or not. For me, regrets have always been harder to live with than the consequences.”
This quote hit me while writing this article because it helps summarize the idea of embracing the unknown. When you think about it, everything in this world is not perfect. Everything we do has positives and negatives, but the “what ifs” will always negatively impact us. Taking that leap of faith will always positively affect us because it can be the best thing that ever happened to us or a lesson well learned that will get us closer to our desired outcome. You will never know unless you start it! Trust me, initially, it will be hard and uncomfortable, but you will be grateful you took the risk regarding the outcome. As long as the risk is healthy, you have nothing to hinder you but yourself and your thoughts. We should all set a goal to do one thing outside your comfort zone this summer, and let us know if it works for you.
Till next time girlies
XOXO GirlsTalkBlog
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